On the Defense

It didn't take long for American Conservatives, far-right and otherwise, to jump on the defense after reports that the horrific Olso massacre had been perpetrated by yet another right-wing, gun-crazy nutcase who sited the writings of several American Conservatives in his "manifesto" as inspiration for his cold-blooded rampage.

Conservative Ross Douthat, writing in The Times today, suggested that former Vice-President Al Gore has used similar irresponsible, inflammatory language in describing his environmental concerns.

Please.

I don't remember waves of gun-toting, crazy liberals shooting down known industrial polluters because of anything Al Gore might have said.  Did I miss that story?

I also don't recall Timothy McVeigh being a tree-hugging lefty.

Instead of playing the "you're just as bad as us" game, Douthat and his ilk might take a serious look at the poisonous, vitriolic language their fellow Conservatives are spouting out on a daily basis:

Sarah Palin tells her acolytes to "lock and load" and provides a map on her website with gun sites, TARGETS, symbolizing areas controlled by problematic Democrats.  One of those people is Gabrielle Giffords.  We all know what happened.

Bill O'Reilly repeatedly calls Dr. George Tiller a "baby killer" on his program for providing reproductive health services for women in Kansas until he is assassinated, gunned down, while praying in church.

Michele Bachmann has called on Conservatives to rise up againest our elected government.  Her violent language is WELL documented.  She and her husband demonize gay people, calling us "barbarians": how much violence has and will result from their ignorant statements?

Meanwhile, what's the worst that the far-left have done to those whose policies they don't agree with?

Well, I recall Michele Bachmann was "glittered" by an LGBT rights activist a few months ago (ie, she had glitter thrown at her).  To be fair, that could have got in her contact lenses.

And Rupert Murdoch almost had a pie thrown in his face.  Almost: his young wife/body guard jumped on the would-be attacker before any fruit filling could stain Murdochs' suit.  That's what you get when you marry Skelator, I guess: never-ending excitement!

Hmmmm.   Guns vs. Glitter and Pastries.

Now Ross Douthat (for a Conservative) seems pretty reasonable, even when I don't agree with a word he writes.  And he makes some good, responsible points elsewhere in his column. 

But please don't even TRY to make a comparison.  Yours is the Party of assault weapons, crazy behavior and violent rhetoric.

Accept it and try to deal with it, before more people are murdered.

Bachmann The Barbarian

Speaking of gay people and closets and homophobia:

There's been some attention being paid lately to Marcus Bachmann, creepy husband of hopeful Republican Presidential candidate and official dingbat Michele Bachmann.

Marcus Bachmann is a therapist whose clinic provides "reparative therapy" to us sick, disgusting gay people.  (This clinic also receives buckets of government money to deliver these nebulous services.  Then again, the Bachmann family farm - it was revealed recently - receives buckets of government money as well.  Which is pretty hypocritical for a such a "no government hand outs"-type of gal like Bachmann.  But that's another story.)

Here's what Marcus Bachmann had to say about gay people:

"We have to understand: barbarians need to be educated. They need to be disciplined. Just because someone feels it or thinks it doesn’t mean that we are supposed to go down that road. That’s what is called the sinful nature. We have a responsibility as parents and as authority figures not to encourage such thoughts and feelings from moving into the action steps…"

Isn't that charming?

What's even more disturbing is that when Marcus Bachmann opens his mouth to deliver these words, his purse falls out.  His voice sounds - as a friend pointed out - just like Corky St. Clair from "Waiting for Guffman".

"Gays are just bastard people!"

Now, I am certainly not suggesting that Marcus Bachmann is gay.  That would be insulting.  To gay people.  "Gay" implies that you are comfortable with yourself and your sexuality.  So, no, Marcus Bachmann is certainly not gay.  He's MARRIED, after all!  To a Christan hottie!

But he certainly seems obsessed with gay people.

He talks about gay people even more than me.  And I am gay.

Which reminds me of some other straight guys who liked to talk about gay people a lot.

Like Larry Craig - he of the wide stance and penchant for airport bathroom shenanigans.

Or George Alan Rekers, author of the repellent "Growing Up Straight: What Every Family Needs To Know About Homosexuality" and frequent customer of "Rentboy.com" for all his European travel needs.

All I'm saying is: when some straight guy starts talking about how to "fix" gay people, maybe they should really be trying to fix themselves.

Bachmann's Waterloo

Oh, Thank you, glorious Satan, for allowing Michelle Bachmann to run for President!

This is going to be QUITE entertaining; watching the ignorant, incoherent, bigoted, mis-informed blather spew from her lips for the next several months.

Bachmann announced her candidacy in her hometown of Waterloo, Iowa yesterday and already the fun is starting!

This is from the New York Times:

"She spoke adoringly of her town, recalling the Dairy Queen, her house on East Ninth Street and the Wonder Bread Factory, where her mother picked up ingredients for her favorite mayonnaise and lettuce sandwiches. But as she stood in her old neighborhood, she misstated a piece of Iowa lore as she explained the important role that Waterloo had in shaping her character.

"John Wayne was from Waterloo, Iowa," Mrs. Bachmann told Carl Cameron of Fox News in an interview. "That's the kind of spirit that I have, too."

The actor was actually born in Winterset, Iowa, which is about 150 miles southwest of Waterloo. It was John Wayne Gacy, known as the killer clown who raped and murdered 33 teenage boys in the 1970s, who lived in Waterloo."

Bachmann later dismissed the error with an "Oh, well.  I'm not perfect!"

No shit, Michele.  No shit.

John Wayne.  John Wayne Gacy.  One of these things is not like the other.

Just to be clear: this moron wants to RUN OUR COUNTRY!  Unbelievable!

A brain-dead chimp with head lice and a yeast infection would make a better President.

Actually, Gacy would have made an excellent running mate! 

Too bad he was executed in 1994.